Slave Resolutions

January 25, 2012

Whether you’re a new submissive for your Master/Mistress, or you’ve been in your BDSM relationship for a while, everyone can improve. If you’ve been wondering how you can better serve your Master/Mistress, you’re already on the right track. As a slave, you need to always think about how you can do more and how you can be more in your Dominant’s eyes. With these New Year resolutions, you can begin to change the way you act in your position as a slave, and this will boost your slave training. (And make Master much happier about your progress.)

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Push Yourself Harder
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If you haven’t been pushing yourself harder in your training sessions, why not make this the year that you do? When you push yourself and you allow yourself to experience more pain and you focus more on what you need to do in the scene, you will begin to see that you CAN do more than you think you can. You might be able to handle more spanking, more caning, and more bondage. Try to see how much further you can push yourself and you might realize that you’re stronger than you think you are. You can be an even BETTER slave when you stop making excuses for not being as good as your Master wants you to be.

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Speak Up When You’re in Pain
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Some slaves are the strong silent types, the ones that never complain. And while they might be a dream for some Dominants, the truth is that they’re miserable. If you’re in pain during a session, you need to speak up. If you continue to not speak up, you may begin to harbor resentment for your Master/Mistress, which is going to impact the rest of your training sessions. When something hurts or something doesn’t feel right during a session, let your Master/Mistress know. They can look into the situation to see if they can help make it better or they can stop what they’re doing to see if they can make some other adjustment. You need to protect your body if you want to be a good slave for your Master/Mistress.

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Learn Your Lessons
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If you’ve been finding that you just can’t remember certain things, then you need to start practicing your training lessons at home. Each day, spend time working on your positions, your answers to commands, etc. You need to make sure that you’re practicing not only the things that you do well, but also the things that you need to improve. Get in front of a mirror and see what your Master sees when he looks at you. Try to focus on the feedback you have gotten from your Master and focus on how you can be better each time you’re in a training session.

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Try Something New
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As is the case for many New Year resolutions, slaves might also want to try something new for a change. Whether this means you change something in your contract or you simply ask to try something different in the dungeon, this is a good way to expand your horizons and test your limits. While you don’t want to do anything that you feel is a hard limit, you also don’t want to hide behind too many limits. As you continue to have trust in your Master/Mistress, you can trust them to take you further than you thought you could go.

This is a year in which you can prove to your Master/Mistress that you are the right slave for them. Push harder, speak up, learn your lessons, and try something new. You might just surprise yourself at how great of a slave you can be.

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>>>For more ways on how to become the type of submissive your Master/Mistress desires go to ===> slave Training Tutorial
=============================================================================

Regards,

Master Bishop

support@bdsmtrainingacademy.com

P.S. If you liked this article, please take a minute to e-mail
your friends and let them know about it. Thanks!

================================================================

Copyright 2008-2012 BDSMTrainingAcademy.com. By reading and
accepting this article you agree to all of the following: You
understand that this is simply a set of opinions, personal
experience and anecdotal evidence (and not advice). You are
responsible for any use of the information in this article, and
hold BDSMTrainingAcademy.com and all members and affiliates
harmless in any claim or event.

================================================================

You must be 18+ years old to read this blog

Posted by admin | Filed Under female submissive training, Male Submissive Training | Leave a Comment

BDSM Question: I Want To Introduce Pain Play To My Partner

January 18, 2012

I want to introduce mild pain – and my boyfriend is very very reluctant to go there. he trusts me, and knows I would not injure him, but this is not a place he wants to go, nor does he think he can find it pleasurable – even if accepting it pleases me.

I can’t force it on him. I can’t take an attitude of “too bad, I am your Mistress and you will do as I say, I don’t care if you don’t like it”

I want to do it, but I also want him to find the pleasure I know can be experienced from it. the question is HOW??

In regards to pain, he can’t take even the minutest amount.. he feels pain in his nipples if i even touch them, let alone nibble on them. I like to bite – not to injure or even leave marks – but nibble. I like to bite just to that point of it feeling painful. I like to bite his lip when we kiss. He says it hurts and asks me not to do it. I do not want to give pain for the sake of giving pain. But I know the pleasure i get from mild pain, I know the rush of endorphins – i want him to experience that as just another level of pleasure i can offer him. He says he trusts me and will accept pain if it is what I desire – but I want him to WANT it. I need him to WANT it.

so, how can I coach him through it? What can I do for him, say to him to relax him, to absorb the pain and embrace it – he knows that the nipples will be my focus if he misbehaves (which is another area I need to work on. I get too soft on him – when he gives me those puppy dog eyes I melt and I know I shouldn’t)

===============
My Response

Pain – it’s something that some people like to inflict, and something that others want to avoid at all costs. And it’s also a sticky subject when you’re ready to try a BDSM flavored relationship.

And while I hate to be the bearer of bad news – your partner doesn’t sound like he’s into pain. At all. This is just the way he is, and it’s not a reflection of who you are. You’re right, you can’t force him to do it. And right now, it sounds like you’re right on the edge of forcing him to do something that he doesn’t want to do.

What I would suggest, and I can’t tell if you’ve done this yet, is that you talk to him about why you want to inflict pain with him. If your partner begins to see the reasoning behind your sexual desire, he might be more open and willing to try things out.

If, and only if, he agrees, then you can begin to coach him through the pain with breathing exercises. Have him practice deep breathing when he feels intense pain and eventually, you can train him to feel less pain or to be affected less by the pain that you inflict.

But I have to say that your question sounds more like you wonder if there’s a way you can make someone like what you like in the bedroom. And honestly, the answer is ‘no.’ You can’t MAKE anyone do what you want them to do, even if you’re a Mistress. If your partner has made it clear that they don’t want to feel pain, you have to respect that limit.

In time, they might change their mind, but it’s up to them to let you know when their mind has changed.

At this point, you have a decision to make. You can either stay with this partner while finding other ways to enjoy their companionship in bed or you can find a new partner who is interested in receiving pain.

Making a person ‘want’ pain is not always possible because some people are just more sensitive than others, and pain is not a pleasant experience for them – no matter how much YOU want it to be.

I say, back off your partner for a bit and let them come to you with the desire to please you. If you just go after them with painful things, they’re going to begin to resent you for hurting them. It needs to be their decision. And if they try it out through their own willingness and they still don’t like it, you need to decide if this is a dealbreaker for you. If so, it’s time to find a new slave.

If they do come to you and want to try some light pain of their own free will there are a few things you can do to make the experiences more pleasurable for them.

1) Know what their limits are and never cross them. Too little is better then too much.

2) Never start with pain. So many Dominants become so excited by the idea that their sub finally wants to try pain, its the first thing they do. The sub may want to experience some pain in their play, but their body is not physically prepared to receive it right away. Any form of pain will be too much to handle at the beginning of a session.

3) The first thing you want to do is get your sub completely relaxed. This means take off any uncomfortable clothes they may be wearing, make sure the room is a comfortable temperature and perhaps even put aside your Dominant nature and give them a relaxing massage.

4) Once they are relaxed, comfortable and calm, you can finally begin heating up their body. Kiss, lick and touch ever single erogenous zone they have. Don’t miss a single inch on their body. Turn them on like they have never been turned on before. Tease, tease and tease so more.

5) Once they are horny and dying to have you, start pleasing them orally. Tell your partner that they are not allowed to orgasm without your permission. So they need to tell you when they are close to cumming. You are going to bring them to the brink of cumming at least three times.

6) Now have your partner bend over, so you have access to both their buttock and genitals. While you keep your partner aroused with one hand, try lightly spank their buttock with the other hand. You have now just introduced mild pain into play and chances are they’re probably enjoying it.

The Reasons Why This Method Works:

Once a body becomes turned on, it can actually handle more pain. The nervous system can only carry one message at a time. With so much pleasure being flooded into the nervous system, the pain messages become diluted. The spanking will seem very mild and most people can easily handle it. Also there is a large nerve that passes through the ass and carries on to the genitals. By stimulating the buttock with spanking, you can in fact stimulate the genitals. Not to mention spankings cause more blood to flow into the buttocks and genitals, hence the reason for the redness. More blood causes an increase in arousal. Lastly, you are using classical conditioning to link mild pain and pleasure together. You are teaching your partner that they can become more aroused and enjoy pain. The two can exist together and in fact heighten the other.

Of course one time will not establish this connection and just because you have tried spanking once and they liked it, does not mean you can start jumping to floggers, paddles, clamps, etc. This is a long learning process and a Dominant must be patient, attentive and understanding of their subs needs.

To learn more about proper spanking techniques and introducing your sub to new fetishes and BDSM training techniques check out BDSM Slave Training Techniques
=============================================================================

Regards,

Master Bishop

support@bdsmtrainingacademy.com

P.S. If you liked this article, please take a minute to e-mail
your friends and let them know about it. Thanks!

================================================================

You must be 18+ years old to read this blog

Posted by admin | Filed Under Dominant Male Training, Dominatrix Training | Leave a Comment

Disappointing Holiday?

January 5, 2012

Posted by admin | Filed Under BDSM Toys, Bondage Gear, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment

Fear In Slave Training

January 4, 2012

Female submissives are certainly going to encounter challenges in their training, even when they least expect it. No matter if a slave has been under the control of a Master for a while or just for a short period, there is a time when the slave will wonder if their Master is going to hurt them or if they are truly able to satisfy their Master. This fear is natural and it can be used to further your training. The delicate balance between fear and trust is one that needs to be addressed frequently as the bond between a Master and slave can not be strengthened without a slave knowing what to do when they feel they can not go on.

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What are You Afraid Of?
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You need to assess what you are afraid of when it hits you during training sessions or outside of sessions. Common fears include:

* Fear of not pleasing – The most common fear of slaves is that they will not be able to please their Masters. And when this happens, a slave can make simple mistakes because they are too afraid of what might happen.

* Fear of pain – Some slaves fear that their Master might inflict more pain then they are able to handle or that a Dominant might permanently injury them, so the physical threat to their bodies is a concern.

* Fear of not being trainable – Many slaves feel that while they want to be trained, they are concerned their Master will not be able to be successful.

These fears, while normal, need to be addressed as they can hold a slave back from their true potential.

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Trusting Your Master
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When you look at these fears, you can see that something is underlying – trust. If you do not trust your Master to train you well, chances are good that you are not giving your full attention to your training. If you do not trust your Master to keep you from physical harm, you might not push yourself as hard during painful sessions. And when you fear that you are not trainable, you show that you do not have trust in your Master to move you in the right direction.

Just reading this, you begin to see that your trust is something that is a gift to your Master. When you’re unable to trust, you’re unable to give yourself fully to your state of being a slave. You’re stuck in the pattern of being unable to present yourself fully in training sessions and in other situations with your Master.

With that said you should never submit to a Dominant that you do not trust. Also never make yourself vulnerable within a submissive training scene to a Dominant that has not proven they are trustworthy outside of a Dom/sub relationship.

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Overcoming Your Fears
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Just as with any fear, there are ways to handle your fears and your lack of trust in your Master.

* Repeat your trust in your Master – Before every session, make sure that you repeat to yourself that you trust your Master with your body and with your mind. In time, you will begin to remind yourself of this instinctually.

* Test your perceived limits – When you feel that you are reaching some sort of limit, test yourself by moving past where you think you can go. If you do not succeed, at least you will have tried, and this will show.

* See pressure from your Master as a sign you are ready for more – If you begin to feel fear about your training because your Master is asking more of you, focus on the idea that your Master would not give you any tests without thinking you could live up to his expectations.

You might have fear, but when you have trust in your Master, you will be able to train effectively and you will submit yourself fully. In this beautiful submission, you will become the slave you want to become.

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Dealing With Trust Issues
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If you can not move past your trust issues then you need to take some time to look at the problem more. Why do you not trust your Master?

* Do you not trust your Dominant because of something they have done in the past? Then you need to sit down with your Dominant and explain to them what they have done that has shattered your trust in them. This way the both of you can figure out how to work through this.

* Do you not trust your Dominant because of things that you have experienced in the past with other people? Take some time and speak with your Dominant about why you have such a hard time trusting people, and that the issue is not just with Him. Perhaps explain the specific situations that caused you to lose your trust in people. With a little communication and some understanding both of you may figure out a way to slowly build your trust.

* Do you not trust your Dominant because the relationship is still new and your Dominant has not proven they are trustworthy? This is very common and understandable, just explain to your Master in a polite and respectful manner that you need more time to get comfortable and build a trusting bond between the two of you.

Don’t silently hold onto your fear and trust issues. This just causes a submissives fears to become worst. Take the time to express your concerns with your Master. This will allow the both of you to finally be able to focus completely on your slave training, the way both of you have always wanted too.

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>>>For more ways to establish and build trust within a new or existing Dom/sub relationship go to ===> BDSM Slave Training
=============================================================================

Regards,

Master Bishop

support@bdsmtrainingacademy.com

P.S. If you liked this article, please take a minute to e-mail
your friends and let them know about it. Thanks!

================================================================

Copyright 2008-2011 BDSMTrainingAcademy.com. By reading and
accepting this article you agree to all of the following: You
understand that this is simply a set of opinions, personal
experience and anecdotal evidence (and not advice). You are
responsible for any use of the information in this article, and
hold BDSMTrainingAcademy.com and all members and affiliates
harmless in any claim or event.

================================================================

You must be 18+ years old to read this blog

Posted by admin | Filed Under Dominant Male Training, Dominatrix Training, female submissive training, Male Submissive Training | Leave a Comment

BDSM Equipment Checklist

January 2, 2012

Whether you are new to BDSM or you are a more experienced couple, you need to remember the basics in the dungeon. When you’re prepared for any scene and for any training session, you don’t have to worry. All you’ll need to focus on is what you need to do in order to create a better training session and a more intense experience for everyone in the room.

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Here’s what needs to be on your BDSM checklist:
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* Safety gear – Before anything else, safety needs to come first. Though you might be able to manage without some safety gear, it is always better to be ready. Safety shears, nitrile gloves and a backup key to your locks is essential, make sure you have yours. BDSM Safety Equipment You may also want to include ointments for burns and cuts, as well as antiseptic for wounds which you can pickup at your local pharmacy.

* Punishment Tools – No matter what sorts of punishments are doled out in your dungeon, having an assortment of props will help you with your scene. You will want to have things like paddles, floggers, genital torture devices and more to ensure you always have exactly what you need, when you need it. Punishment Tools

Punishment Tools

* Costumes – If you’re interested in roleplaying, it’s a good idea to have costumes or some themed props readily available. This will help you create a scene, when a slave least expects it. BDSM Costumes

BDSM Fetish Clothing

* High quality ropes – Ropes that are made from natural fibers are best when you are in a scene. Not only are they easy to cut if there’s a problem, but they’re also better on the skin and more resilient during scenes. Good Quality rope can be purchased for cheap at any HomeDepot.

* Safety tapes – Nonstick tapes can be a great way to add bondage, gags, and blindfolds without any pain. Look for athletic wrap tapes (found at any local pharmacy) as well as bondage tape to help you add to your collection.

* Gags – If your slave is interested in being gagged, there are a number of different ways that you can do this when you have an assortment of gags available. Try to use as many as possible in order to keep a slave guessing. BDSM Mouth Gags

BDSM Mouth Gags

* Water – It’s always a good idea to have water in the dungeon during long and intense scenes. You need to stay hydrated if you want to keep going for hours.

* Snacks – Having some fruit, cheese and crackers on hand to help keep sugar levels regular is always a good idea. After such long hours playing blood sugar levels can drop, which is never a nice feeling. This can lead to fatigue, dizziness and in extreme cases fainting and mood shifts such as anxiety and panic attacks.

* Scarves – Scarves can be a great way to add some additional bondage to a scene or they can simply be used to cover the eyes to keep a slave on their toes.

* Bed restraints – If you have a bed, restraints that work with the bed frame will help to make your bondage scenes quicker, easier, and effective. Bed Restraints

Bed Restraints

* Metal Cuffs – There’s nothing like good old metal cuffs to help you bring a little bondage into the bedroom. Metal Cuffs

Metal Cuffs

Yes, you can certainly add more or take away some of the items from this list. What you do in the bedroom will require certain items to always be there. But what you need to remember is that the more you have available, and the more organized you are, the easier it will be to create scenes on the fly. When you do this, you will be able to have a more intense BDSM relationship, right from the start.

Take some time today to write down what you have in your dungeon and what you want to have in your dungeon. Think about what you want to use and what you need to use to train or to be trained. This will help to ensure you are always prepared for your next scene to begin. Get the Bondage Gear and BDSM Toys that you need and want.

Regards,
Master Bishop

support@bdsmtrainingacademy.com

P.S. If you liked this article, please take a minute to e-mail
your friends and let them know about it. Thanks!

================================================================

You must be 18+ years old to read this blog

Posted by admin | Filed Under BDSM Toys, Bondage Gear | Leave a Comment

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Slave Resolutions

BDSM Question: I Want To Introduce Pain Play To My Partner

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