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Is It Coincidence?

July 21, 2014

The beauty of a silent submissive



















I think this was very much on purpose.  To listen one must be silent, both truly important skills for a submissive to master.  What do you think?

Master Bishop

 

Sub Question: How Do I Beg/Plead Better

July 15, 2014

A begging slave

Hi I was wondering if you could give me some useful tips on how to plead/beg better, I am OK But I feel I could do much better, I know submissiveness comes from the heart and it does with me, but there is always room for improvement, one never stops learning.

Anonymous

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Master Bishop’s Opinion:

When it comes to begging and pleading, there are certainly always opportunities for improvement. One of the things I most often notice about submissives is that they don’t seem sincere. They just say the first thing that pops into their head. Which tends to translate too “Please may I XXXXX”

To serve your Mistress or Master better, you will want to make sure your begging comes from a deeper place, a place of wanting to please and a place of wanting to do all that you can to serve.

(more…)

What works well is to make sure you are specific in your begging. When you aren’t specific, it’s hard to feel the heart of what you want – which I imagine is your deep need to be submissive. Think about what you want and about how you feel about your Dominant. This might require you do some homework before you enter a scene, and that you start thinking about your role long before you’re in a dungeon. Make a list of all of the ways in which you serve and how you want to serve your Dominant.  Beside that list, write out why you enjoy serving in that way. How do you feel when you are actually performing those tasks for your Dominant. Much of your begging can stem from these internal drives. Include these internal desires in your begging. Begging is essentially becoming an open book to your Dominant and verbally expressing your deepest desires for their Them and Their Domination.  Review this list again and again to ensure you’re in the mindset of being a submissive, rather than just playing the part of one.

When you truly become connected to your submissive role and desires, you will show your Dominant that you are sincere. Part of this connection can also come from talking to your Dominant about what they want from you. By understanding their needs, you can fulfill your role. This is something I often do outside of the scene, as you don’t want to interrupt a high-energy scene with a lot of discussion. Set aside time with your Dominant, with the goal of understanding how they want to see you beg and plead more effectively and authentically.

It can also be helpful to have a discussion about the scene after it is over. When you are asking for corrections and guidance, you are more involved and therefore more effective.

Within the scene itself, it makes sense to be clear about when begging and pleading are appropriate. When your Dominant asks you what you want, state what you want clearly and then become subservient. Use the title that your Dominant has asked you to use, and also be clear about using the name for yourself that has been chosen – i.e. ‘this slave.’

Talking in the third person can also help to differentiate between your role and the role of your Dominant. This creates even more distance between the power roles, and will allow the begging to be even more effective. Talking about ‘this slave’ or ‘your slave’ will allow you to show you not only understand your role, but you also can understand how your Dominant sees you.

Over time, it might become apparent what works best for your relationship, as all relationships are different. While I want to tell you that one thing will work in all situations, this is simply not true. Instead, you need to be ready and willing to work with your Dominant to find out what will be most effective in your unique situation.

Begging and pleading is also more engaging when you repeat what you want over and over again. Repetition allows time for the Dominant to hear your longing, to know your true desire to please. Though there is a point at which repetition can come across as false, the more you repeat your pleading, the more you will break through to the true nature of your words.

You will break down and come to the place where it’s clear you are giving over your will to your Dominant.

Practice does make perfect in this case. With dedication, clarity, and inner reflection, your begging and pleading will become genuine. You will truly be the slave your Dominant wants you to be.

If you have a begging/pleading tip that you would like to share, please share it below.

Regards, Master Bishop

================================================================

Copyright 2008-2014 BDSMTrainingAcademy.com. By reading and
accepting this article you agree to all of the following: You
understand that this is simply a set of opinions, personal
experience and anecdotal evidence (and not advice). You are
responsible for any use of the information in this article, and
hold BDSMTrainingAcademy.com and all members and affiliates
harmless in any claim or event.

================================================================

You must be 18+ years old to read this blog

Why Speaking Sweetly Can Make Your Sub Cringe

July 9, 2014

Your sub, by now, knows about your mean voice and it probably makes him cringe. He doesn’t know what it might be saying, but he knows he’s in for something terrible. When you start to create a long-term BDSM relationship, it’s easy to fall into patterns that work for you. And when you’re training your slave, being mean is often a great way to make sure that he listens. But you need to switch things up – by talking sweetly.

More Flies with Honey?

When you think about it, you already know that talking sweetly to others will get you what you want. Though you might try to be mean in your everyday life, that just doesn’t work as well outside of the dungeon. Instead, you need to be nice, but not so nice that you’re a pushover. When you are with your slave and you tell him naughty and horrible things in a sweet voice, he will still get the message. Notice how he shivers a bit because you sound like you’re sweet, even harmless, but the content of what you’re saying is going to cause him to be at your feet. He knows that you could turn in an instant, and that keeps him on his toes. (more…)

Keeping Your Words the Same

Yes, when you’re changing the way that you talk to your slave, remember that content is more important than ever. You need to keep up the humiliation, the taunting, and the names that you call your slave. When you do this, you will ensure that he listens because he’s not expecting to hear any of that. He might be thinking that you’re finally going to treat him like a true equal, or some other crazy thought. Instead, you need to continue talking to him, training him, and you’ll notice that he’s not as painful during training sessions where he just seems to ache for punishment. Instead, he listens to you because he knows that you’re still focused on making him the best slave possible.

Never Be the Same Person Twice

You can start talking sweetly without any introduction. Keep your voice light and feminine, if possible, and talk about things without yelling once during a training session. Not only will this shift training for your slave, but you will also notice that you’re not going to be as overwhelmed by the sessions either. You’re going to stay cool and collected, allowing your slave to have the best possible training. Your head will be in the game and you will stay detached, to a certain extent, because you’re not raising your voice and getting more heated (and exhausted) than you need to be.

Speaking sweetly may not seem like the meanest toy in your dungeon, but it’s essential when you have a slave that has grown accustomed to the way that you usually do things. By merely talking without any anger or intensity, you will make your slave realize that you are always their Mistress, no matter what you might sound like. They will begin to learn that you are the one that is in charge, even when you’re not upset with them. Sometimes, you need to catch a slave with a honey voice, one that makes them wonder when you might turn on the anger again. The anticipation of being afraid of you will only make them more nervous about what you’re going to do next. And that’s the mindset your slave should have as they are training. They’re yours to control because they are only looking to you for guidance.

Regards,

Mistress Sophia

================================================================

Copyright 2008-2014 BDSMTrainingAcademy.com. By reading and
accepting this article you agree to all of the following: You
understand that this is simply a set of opinions, personal
experience and anecdotal evidence (and not advice). You are
responsible for any use of the information in this article, and
hold BDSMTrainingAcademy.com and all members and affiliates
harmless in any claim or event.

================================================================

You must be 18+ years old to read this blog

Domination Of An Alpha Submissive

June 25, 2014

Having discussed the ups and downs of a long term Dominant/submissive relationship with Master Alan, I figured everybody could benefit from their fifteen years together.  While a Dom/sub dynamic seems simple enough from the outside looking, in fact it can be even more complex and difficult to manage.  However, the benefits and joys that one can experience if able to work through such difficult situations can prove to be truly euphoric.  Many would agree well worth any struggle.

This is why I asked Master Alan to share with you his story about the winding and sometimes bumpy road He and his Alpha submissive took to get where they are now.  Clearly this long journey can not be expressed in one article, so Master Alan will be sharing his story in multiple articles.  I hope you enjoy and learn from his experience and knowledge.

Regards,

Master Bishop

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I want to take a moment to clarify something. What I will be discussing here is my personal dynamic and beliefs. I personally feel that when you place a collar on a sub/slave (s/s) that it holds the same weight as a legal marriage. It is a commitment. I am not referring to a collar used during play for purposes of restraint. I am talking about when you collar a s/s as your property and take ownership. You should also understand that this lifestyle has many different aspects to it. What works for us, can be (and usually is), totally different from what works for others. There is no right or wrong dynamic, but what works for your situation. Our dynamic has evolved over the years to what it is today. I am sure that it will look totally different ten years from now.

(more…)

We have been together almost fifteen years as of this writing. We were legally married over fourteen years ago and after the reception I placed my collar on her. She didn’t cry at the wedding but she did as I slipped that collar around her neck. We have had our ups and downs and nearly divorced four years ago. We have worked through all of our issues and continue to move forward. Living a D’s dynamic can be more challenging than a vanilla relationship, but the rewards are far greater. When your s/s is completely devoted to you in their heart, mind and soul, you will know what I mean.

Most could not handle my sub. She is an alpha female outside of our relationship. She is an extremely strong willed person. When we met, she was a go to, get it done business manager. She was on top of her game and climbing the corporate ladder. She was in charge of all aspects of her professional life. At the time her personal life was full of ups and downs, with mostly downs. She had always dated men that have dominant personalities but not in the D’s lifestyle. Most were abusive, in a bad way, and a couple were just game players or trolls. Due to things that happened to her as a child and as an adult, she had built a huge wall around herself. She had serious trust issues which included her family. At the end of the day when we are at home, she submits to my authority. She knows that I will do what’s best for us and I have her complete trust.

The first obstacle I had, was gaining her trust. A s/s gives their submission to you, it is not something that you can take from them. A s/s will not give their submission to someone they don’t trust. A sub must know that you have their best interest at heart and that you will not injure them. They must also trust you not to push them beyond their limits, turning what should be fun play into outright abuse or assault. They must also trust that their submission is not a one way street.

A s/s is still a person, a human being. They have needs, wants and fears and it is different for each one. All of the Dominants, with long lasting D’s relationships which I know, have taken the time to figure out the things their s/s needs and provide it. They give back to their s/s in a loving and caring way. This will definitely look different in every relationship, but it is there.

We as Doms/Masters (D/M) are responsible for our play things. It is a responsibility that should not be taken lightly. When you take on a full time sub/slave, you become responsible for their health and well-being. If they are sick you take them to the doctor. If they are sad you comfort them. If they need clothing, you buy it. The list goes on, but each s/s will have needs that must be met if you’re going to have a successful D’s relationship. They are still human beings and look to us to provide them some form of security and comfort in their lives.

Our personal dynamic has changed several times over the years. My sub was a stay at home mom for ten years but is back in the workforce. During the time she was a stay at home, all of the domestic responsibilities fell on her. She was responsible for keeping the home running on a day to day basis. I paid bills and did do more of the “man-ly” things like yard work and home repairs. I do a lot of cooking as well. I enjoy it and I am a much better cook than her because I have trained with professional chefs. Once she reentered the workforce we changed our dynamic. We now split the work at home and normally complete all the domestic duties by working together. It allows us more time and energy to do the things that truly matter.

On my next writing I will get more into the dynamic of our personal relationship. Remember, this is how I live a D’s dynamic and is not an end all for a D’s relationship. Ours is a committed life long relationship and requires work every day if it is to survive.

Sincerely,

Master Alan

================================================================

Copyright 2008-2014 BDSMTrainingAcademy.com. By reading and
accepting this article you agree to all of the following: You
understand that this is simply a set of opinions, personal
experience and anecdotal evidence (and not advice). You are
responsible for any use of the information in this article, and
hold BDSMTrainingAcademy.com and all members and affiliates
harmless in any claim or event.

================================================================

You must be 18+ years old to read this blog

All About Ass Worship

June 19, 2014

Slave Worshipping Dominatrix' AssFor some BDSM couples, it’s all about the ass. And why shouldn’t it be? Round and ripe for all sorts of play, this area of the body can be erogenous as much as it can be a target for punishment. In the practice of ass worship, you can begin to focus on your partner’s ass or you can have your ass worshipped, depending on your desires. Here are some basic ways you can begin to create an ass filled night, pun intended.

Oral Pleasure and the Ass

While many people think that ass worship only goes one way, in fact ass worship can go both ways.

Worshiping your Dom/me’s Ass:  Any submissive can easily  pleasure their Master’s cock or their Mistress’ pussy on command. Most usually beg for the chance.  However, to be forced to get on their knees and only be allowed to pleasure the dirtiest of holes can be a powerful experience for a sub.  This form of ass worship expresses two very clear points: (more…)

1)The submissive is not an equal to the Dom/me and that their place is beneath their Dom/me. Literally with their face in the Dom/me’s ass. Ever heard of a “Brown-Noser?” This is literally what you are making your sub do.  They have to suck up to the Dom/me by sticking their face in the Dominant’s ass.

2) It is the submissive’s job to please their Dom/me, in any way They may desire (within pre-discussed limits).  A good submissive will want to please their Dom/me even if it means that they are only worthy enough to worship their Dom/me’s ass.  Think about it, a Dom/me only uses this part of their body for dirtiest of activities and a submissive is being made to worship it.  This can be a very humiliating and/or humbling experience for a slave.

Worshiping A Slave’s Ass:  There’s nothing as exciting as making a slave scream with pleasure when a Dom/me is worshiping a slave’s ass orally. When the slave is bound up, they can have their ass licked and stimulated with the tongue. While this is pleasurable for lots of subs because of the many nerve endings in the ass, this can also be a scene of humiliation for some slaves. Since the ass is the ‘dirty’ place that no one is supposed to see or to touch, this becomes a risqué and edge pushing scene for many a slave. To prepare for this sort of scene, it might be a good idea for the slave to be instructed to clean the area thoroughly as this will only serve to make them all the more excited for the upcoming scene.

This type of worship also enforces the idea that the sub’s body belongs to their Dom/me.  That no part of their body is off limits (if previously agreed upon).  Their body belongs to their Dominant, including this most intimate and sensitive of areas.

Filling the Ass for Pleasure

But this anal opening is also a place that is not supposed to have anything put into it, which can make this a very intense scene.

Worshiping A Slave’s Ass: Penetrating a submissive anally can have a very powerful effect for both the Dom/me and sub.  The anus is such a extremely sensitive and delicate part of a person’s body, even more so then the vagina or penis.  Therefore to receive something in the anus at their Dom/me’s command takes a lot of trust from a submissive and makes them extremely vulnerable. Penetrating a submissive anally can show:

1) That the submissive trusts their Dominant and that even when given access to such a delicate part of a sub, they know their Dominant will protect them and do everything in your power to not hurt them.

2) That the submissive’s body belongs to the Dom/me and they will provide the Dom/me with pleasure when they want and how they want.  Even if it means giving their Dominant access to such an uncommonly used hole.

When you want to worship a slave’s ass, it can be highly exciting to see what sorts of items can be placed into the anus. Don’t get too carried away, some slaves have tighter asses, so they will need you to begin very slowly. Anal Training a submissive is not an overnight process, it is very hard for both the Dom/me and submissive. One helpful tool can be to incorporate an anal training kit. These kits include butt plugs that gradually get larger with each plug, helping the slave begin to feel more and more comfortable with anal penetration one step at a time. Dildos can also be used as can inflatable butt plugs, when the submissive becomes more comfortable and advanced.

Helpful Tip: Keep these items in the ass as long as possible during other activities, i.e. oral sex, to help connect the ass play with pleasure.

Worshiping A Dom/me’s Ass: While anally penetrating a Dom/me is not as common as with a sub in a Dom/sub relationship, there are some Dom/me’s that do enjoy this kind of worship.  While the submissive may get a chance to worship their Dom/me’s ass by penetrating it, this does not mean they will have the honor of being the one to penetrate it. 

Many Dom/mes will use a dildo face harness so they can still enjoy the sensations of anal penetration while maintaining a Dominant position with their submissive.   This power dynamic is maintained while: 

1) The submissive is allowed to pleasure their Dom/me as is their job, they however do not get the honor of being the one to penetrate their Dom/me.  This means they are always on the outside, so there is no physical stimulation for them to enjoy as they service their Dom/me. All they can do is focus on worshiping their Dom/me’s ass as they move the harness in and out

2) The Dominant stands over their submissive, thus forcing the sub to their knees and beneath their Dom/me in order to utilize the face harness.

3) For a sub knowing they are so close to something they know would feel amazing can drive them wild.  Being in this frenzied state can heighten their need to please their Dom/me for hopefully that one chance that they just might be allowed. A powerful tool in any Dom/me’s arsenal is creating a state of wild frenzied sexual energy mixed with hope that can keep a sub truly motivated. Hence allowing a submissive to look but not to touch.

Punishment and Ass Play

Some Dominants like to worship the ass by seeing just how much abuse it can take. You can use several different techniques to make sure the ass is cherry red and sensitive at the end of the session: spanking, flogging, whipping, etc. It’s always a good idea to begin with spanking as this will make the blood rush to the surface of the skin, and this will ensure maximum sensitivity for other implements. Once the skin is good and red, then you can use a crop or some other implement to continue the ass worship. Of course, inserting something into the ass during this practice can be a good test of a slave’s concentration. Let them know they need to keep the object in their ass – or get punished even more.

Whether Y/you want to show Your submissive that their body belongs to You or prove to your Dominant how much you worship every inch of Them.   Everyone wins with ass worship, so don’t forget to add some into your training regime.

Regards,

Master Bishop

P.S.  Feel free to add any of your favorite ways to ass worship.  Just leave a comment below.

================================================================

Copyright 2008-2014 BDSMTrainingAcademy.com. By reading and
accepting this article you agree to all of the following: You
understand that this is simply a set of opinions, personal
experience and anecdotal evidence (and not advice). You are
responsible for any use of the information in this article, and
hold BDSMTrainingAcademy.com and all members and affiliates
harmless in any claim or event.

================================================================

You must be 18+ years old to read this blog

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