My Boyfriend Wants Me To Dominate Him

April 21, 2011


Dear Mistress Sophia,

My boyfriend has asked me to dominate. Your emails have been a
great help. I’m not a cruel person so I’m having a hard time.
How do I lose my soft touch and become a Mistress?


V.W. Halifax


Here is My response:

While many women look soft and mysterious, many more women are
looking to get in touch with their dark and nasty side. They want
to be that woman in the leather with the crop and the dirty talk.
But as many women have been told for years that they need to be
soft and gentle, turning on your freaky Mistress persona may not be
as easy as it seems. Not to fear – there are plenty of ways to get
in touch with the Dominatrix inside of you.

Why Do You Want to Be a Mistress?

Before you even begin to shop for your next whip, you need to stop
and ask yourself why you want to be a Mistress in the first place.
Do you want to please your partner or do you want to try out
something that sounds hot to you? There isn’t a wrong answer here,
but those who aren’t actually ‘into’ being the one in control might
have a little more trouble going over to the dark side, so to
speak. It’s not impossible, of course, but recognize that you
might have to work a little harder to be a little nasty.

If you’re already turned on by the idea of making someone lick your
boots, you already know the reader for your Mistress desires – you
want a slave to kneel before you and do whatever you ask.

Ask Yourself What You Enjoy

To start things off, you need to start looking at yourself as the
one that is going to call the shots – because that’s your role as
the Mistress. And whatever Mistress wants, Mistress gets. So,
what do you want to do? What do you want to make your slave do for
you? Get creative here. You might want to make a list of the
things you might want to do to someone else, or you might want to
make a list of the things you want a slave to do for you. This is
going to help you start fantasizing about what your actual play
scenes will look like and what you need to do in order to turn your
dreams into realities.

Look at Your Options

It never hurts to look at a few BDSM flavored websites to see what
these fine folks are offering. You might get inspired to try out a
few discipline devices – whips, crops, bondage, etc. Take some
time to look around and see what really tickles your fancy and
seems like something you could handle with authority. After all,
you want your slave to believe you are in control. Buy a few
things and then try them out on your own. This way, you’ll know
what you’re doing before you even see a sub kneel before you.

Watch the Sub Change into a Slave

You need to have a plan in order to be a Dominatrix that strikes
fear and love into the hearts of her slaves. What you need to do
is to have a few things in mind:

* Plan ahead
* Set the scene
* Have the tools ready
* Watch your slave
* Discipline and correct as necessary

The more you plan, the easier it will be to get into the Domination
part of your fantasy. Think about what you want to do, and even if
you don’t follow your own plan perfectly, at least the slave will
think you are in control at all times. And there’s nothing hotter
than watching a slave squirm to please you.


Getting in touch with your Mistress side takes a little practice, and a lot of knowledge but once you get started, you’ll begin to see just how rewarding controlling someone else is. And that soft touch will be a thing of the past. For more information on how to unleash your inner Dominatrix go to:

Dominatrix Training Tips

Don’t forget the advanced Dominatrix lesson to getting you sub to do whatever you want from just the sound of your voice.

How To Talk Like A Dominatrix


Mistress Sophia


P.S. If you liked this article, please take a minute to e-mail
your friends and let them know about it. Thanks!


Copyright 2008 By reading and
accepting this article you agree to all of the following: You
understand that this is simply a set of opinions, personal
experience and anecdotal evidence (and not advice). You are
responsible for any use of the information in this article, and
hold and all members and affiliates
harmless in any claim or event.


You must be 18+ years old to read this blog


Dominant Training


Submissive Training

  • Make your Dominant proud. Learn how to become an obedient submissive

  • Crawl inside and learn the secrets to beginning your bdsm training journey to becoming Their perfect slave.

  • Enter Slave Training